About… Or the big question, Why?

So, the big question as I am setting out on this journey of writing is why… So many why’s… Why did I say writer instead of blogger? Well, because I am from the day where you used to actually write your words. Is that sufficient? No. Guess I need to give more credit to bloggers because the term writer, in my mind, is an author of a book, or a journalist. But, these days, bloggers are writers. We express what we feel. So, I’m a writer. I write what I feel. So, if you’re still with me, here I go in to my explanation of why (and this may be more self therapy than anything).

Why am I doing this? Because I have feelings and opinions. So many that my mind cannot keep holding them. I have a note section on my phone that holds so many of my ideas. I started doing that a few months ago when subjects would just pop in to my head and I knew that I needed to explore them. You know how when you are watching a movie and even though the actress is so good you wish that they had a bit of a voice over so you could hear what is going on in their mind… I mean, really! They walk in to room looking so confident and then they portray later that they were so freaking nervous. Come on! I want to hear the thoughts in their head as they are walking in…

“Chin up, suck the stomach in, look around, smile, left, right, left, ooops, move to the left a bit, there you go, right, left… why the hell did I wear these underwear… right, left…”

I want to hear a real person. So, there it is. That’s what this is… And since I’m a real person…

Back to being a writer and why…

I have seen blogs and they post perfect pictures of food. Ok, I make good food but is it instagram worthy? No. But, I have facebook friends that ask for the recipe. Do I have the perfect dog? No. In fact, she stole a shoe of mine the other day and took it outside to chew and rub through the dirt. Do I have the perfect children? Well, I have a teenage son that likes to roll his eyes at me and seem disgusted that I don’t remember 11^th grade history lessons.

I have researched so many different topics and I just wish that there was someone like me that is wondering… Do I really need to lose those extra 20 pounds? Is it appropriate to buy things off Amazon using the filters of ‘prime’ and ‘price low to high’? Do I need to grab extra napkins because this movie is going to make me ugly cry? Is this cheap wine going to taste like I am living a good life? Can I be friends with someone that is the opposite of my political view? Does God get upset when I talk to a tarot card reader in New Orleans? Did I not set a good enough example for my kids because I didn’t go after a college degree? (Although, I am highly certified in my current position. Technically, I could have letters after my name). Those people that post all the motivating posts on facebook, are they really that happy or are they putting on a good portrayal? Have I screwed up my children by staying single instead of showing them what a marriage looks like?

So many questions and so many google search histories… But, this is what I want to do. I want all of my thoughts in one place because there is something I have realized while talking with so many different people… We all wonder the same things.

Why I will never be famous for my writing… I type the way I talk. For business reasons, sometimes that doesn’t work out quite well. Like, I want to put happy faces in my emails to clients, but is that appropriate? Once I know the client, it can be. Then again, when I have someone do it to me in a work email, I think, “We will work well together. They’re a real person.”

So, let’s see where this goes. I might learn about me and you know what… You might learn that you are not alone. Because that is what we are all striving for… To realize that we are not alone in this journey of life.