life – Swimming With The Rain

Life

Therapy Day 3 – I just wanted to feel…

May 12, 2023

Here’s what I am realizing about therapy, when random questions are asked, they are not random. It’s like magic when they ask a question and all of a sudden, the filing cabinets in your brain start to open and all of these memories come flooding out.

The magic question – “What were your birthday’s like for you?”

We talked about my constant fear of being judged, even by those that love me. One thing I will discuss here is my ex-husband. After a wedding reception, my husband (at the time) told me that I move my hips too much. This was coming from a Latin man whose culture is constant hip motion when dancing. So, I quit dancing with him. My own husband could not accept me.

I have lived my life being judged. My weight (even when it was low, I was teased), my nose, my grades, my driving, my choices in who I dated, the raising of my children. But, when you have felt this way for over 40 years, it is a hard habit to break.

Some women, myself included, do not like being celebrated on their birthdays. It has nothing to do with the fear of growing older, it has to do with being made to feel like it is a hassle to celebrate on the big day.

“I don’t like this restaurant, I’m not sure why you picked here.”

“Oh, now we have to buy you a gift.”

“I couldn’t think of what to get you, so here.”

“Why are we doing this after work, I’m exhausted at the end of the day.”

“I don’t like that flavor of ice cream.”

I broke down crying and said, “All I wanted was ONE day to feel special. Like I mattered.”

Well, here we are. Getting all of this off my chest felt like a weight lifted and now that I have been able to vocalize my fear of being judged, but yet wanting to feel special (but judged for wanting to feel special), I feel more confident. Now that I am beginning to understand the basis of my problems, I can work on moving away from them.

While I understand that my problems may seem trivial to what is out there with others. I have not shared publicly what my issues stem from, nor have I shared what those issues are.

However, I can assure you that girls that do not grow up confident that they are loved, will make a lot of stupid decisions in life when they are looking for it.

woman in gray jacket and white skirt standing on stairs

So, let her dance the night away, let her blow out her candles by herself, let her be excited that she is getting her choice of cake, be excited that you get to have dinner with her that evening, don’t make fun of her when she is embarrassed that people are singing to her, put thought in to the gift so that she knows you are excited to have picked it out for her… At least on that one day a year, focus on HER. Be excited that you are part of her life and that she wants to celebrate with YOU.

God

Angel Numbers

May 10, 2023

I had just made my lunch, sat down with a fork in my hand, tapped on my phone to see the time, and what did I see? 1:11! I was excited to seeing these numbers and knew that it was God’s way of waving, winking, and saying hello.

Up until a couple of years ago, I had a post-it note on my office laptop to remind me of what each Angel Number was for. Since I am working on building back my peaceful inner dialogue, I knew that I needed to research this information again, because I love when I get these little hello’s from God.

white clouds and blue sky — ***I am very much a believer in God. I also believe that God shows himself in ways that YOU will understand, to draw you closer to Him.***

Time watching has always been a habit of mine. When telling a story, I will tell you that it was 3:17 when something happened, not 3:15 or a quarter after 3. When I see certain times, I think of people or holidays. 2:18, my oldest son’s date of birth. 12:25, Merry Christmas! 3:02, Happy Birthday to my mom. And if I think of you when I see your date of birth or partial phone number, just know that I said a prayer for you.

So, if you want to see a few God winks or when He says hello, take a look and maybe incorporate some of these in to your thought process. Still thinking that Angel Numbers are against your religion or might be bad juju? Well, I bet you have a lucky number, right? Is it really your lucky number or do you just feel confident with your choice… Go ahead, step back and allow God to say hello to you with a bit of inspiration.

Reminder – numbers must show in 3 or 4 increments. IE – 111, 2222

0 – New opportunities! You have a fresh start to create new adventures. Don’t be afraid to go big and go bold!

1 – New beginnings! Step in to your self-confidence, set an intention, and focus on yourself.

a close up shot of a child holding a number cutout

2 – Balance, Harmony, Alignment. You are exactly where you need to be and you should savor the moment.

3 – Creativity! Go ahead and shine with self-expression, embrace collaborative energy, and think outside the box.

4 – Stability and Inner Wisdom! Go ahead and trust yourself. You’ve been working hard in the right direction.

5 – Possible curveball! Embrace change and keep a positive mindset. Things may be happening behind the scenes, but you’re on the right path.

6 – Connect with your heart! Seek comfort, reframe from negative thoughts, and be kind to yourself. Choose how you want to interpret a situation and remember that everything happens for a reason.

7 – Lucky! Let go of your fears, listen to your instincts, trust in the universe, say a payer for good fortune.

8 – Abundance! Similar to the infinity symbol that continues like an endless flow of life, now is a good time to let the world know exactly what you want.

9 – Ending! That’s not a bad thing. A situation may soon be ending, or you are close to achieving a goal. It’s a great time to step outside of your comfort zone to make things happen and expand your horizons.

There are doubters in this world that will say that referring to Angel Numbers is a bit too new age for them, or it is for the “hippies”. Here is how I think it brings me peace… In the middle of my day when I am worried about life in general and wondering how I will get through certain things, when I see numbers that make me smile, that is what I do. It’s God reminding me that He is with me and that he has my back. God has a fun way of jumping in to our lives, if we will just watch out for it.

Life

Therapy, Part 2 – Get Off the Bicycle

May 9, 2023

Last week’s therapy session was insightful, and thankfully, not overly emotional. For years, I had the mindset of, “I’m good, but not good enough” and could trace it back to elementary school. The therapist and I dug a bit deeper and did determine how it came about, and a major one hit me pretty hard. While I understand that it was never intentional, it gave me a deeper understanding of how words and actions can have a lifelong impact on someone.

Something that we did discuss was quite interesting, my lack of speaking up for what I want. I was raised in the 70’s and 80’s, and it was seen as selfish to speak up and say, “This is what I want.” However, what I realize now is that I should have spoken up for what I did “need”.

My father used to have a funny saying, “Shit in one hand, want in the other. See which one fills up faster.”

As a child, I would always think, “I have a lot of wants, so that doesn’t make sense.” Trust me, I totally get where he is coming from, and I am sure that I may have used that phrase on my own kids from time to time. What I am realizing now, there is a difference between wants and needs.

Of course I wanted the cool Trapper Keeper binder that all the other kids had. But, I also needed reassurance, hugs, unconditional love, positive words, a place where I could feel like I belong and was accepted. I am not saying that I wasn’t given those things in some degrees. I’m expressing the difference between wants and needs.

In elementary, I generally had all A’s. B’s would pop in here and there, usually in Science and P.E. But, Spelling and Language Arts, those were my favorites. We had smart kids that left our class once a week to go to GATE (Gifted and Talented Education) and yes, there was a bit of jealousy from all of us that wanted to be them. Every year in 4th, 5th, and 6th, I tested for this program, sure that I would soon be among my people.

young girl wearing white long sleeve shirt sitting on table

Each year, I was told that I was good, but not good enough.

Back to the speaking up… 7th grade volleyball… I had never played volleyball before but upon entering Junior High, this was part of P.E. and I loved it. Bump, set, spike. I was working on perfecting my bump and knew that both forearms should be used, how to angle my arms to make the ball go a certain way. Set… When done correctly, the ball feels as light as a feather when it touches your fingertips, to be pushed back up to the person ready to spike. Spiking is where I wasn’t very good. But, most of us at that time were still learning as it was a new sport introduced to our grade.

As volleyball season approached, I was encouraged to try out for the team. I gave it my all and I loved it. Feeling like part of a team and the camaraderie that was built… It felt right. I needed a group of girls that believed and encouraged me. As we grew closer to the announcing of the team, girls were eliminated, but I still stood. My confidence grew. Maybe I am good enough.

We were down to the final two that would be eliminated. The last practice, I pushed myself harder than I had ever worked for anything, hoping I was good enough to make the team. I wasn’t.

Next year, it was the same thing, but I was better prepared for it in my mind, because I was becoming an expert at not being good enough.

This is where the therapist comes in…

Why didn’t you make it?

I don’t know.

You didn’t ask?

No.

Then how would you know what to get better at?

(Blank stare)

What did you think about after you didn’t make it?

They had a near perfect season. I knew that if I had been on that team, they would not have done as well, so it was better that I wasn’t on it.

In high school, my first P.E. teacher was the volleyball coach. While doing drills, she said to me, “I better see you trying out for the volleyball team.” That phrase made me feel like I had someone on my side and I wanted her approval. Ms. K was loved by everyone and she made sure to give kids tough love, but in a supportive way. I knew that I needed her. But, when volleyball tryouts came around, I went to the first couple of practices. After watching those around me, I made up an excuse to Ms. K on why I couldn’t try out and moved on. What I didn’t tell her was that I felt that I would never be as good as those other girls and could not face disappointment like that again, after working so hard to prove myself. One of the great things the next year in school, Ms. K gave her approval for me to have 7th period P.E., which was advanced volleyball.

You were only in that class if you were on any of the volleyball teams, or had serious potential. I was covered in bruises and my forearms were rock hard. I loved feeling like part of a team and for one period a school day, I was.

I never tried out for volleyball in high school, much to the dismay of the coach. They had a great season, and I knew that if I had been on that team, they would not have.

However, I did try out for cheerleading. In freshman year, one of my bestfriends was a cheerleader. Since every little girl grows up thinking that cheerleading is for the elite special people, of course we all wanted to be cheerleaders. So, with the help of my bestfriend, I practiced. And practiced. And practiced some more. Herkies, Toe Touch, Tuck Jump, Side and Front Hurdler… Back then, we didn’t have cell phones so we used the reflection from the sliding glass door to perfect our techniques.

Do you know what I wasn’t good at? Fake excitement. I did great in the group tryouts, the written test, you name it. But, when it came time for me to stand in front of the judges and perform by myself and get “excited” about a game that I could not see, I couldn’t do it. I was embarrassed to show excitement.

I would not have thought that such minor issues from my school days would still have an effect on me. But, they helped to set a pattern on the way I view the world. Unfortunately, when I am not accepted by someone, I revert to the thinking, “I am not good enough.” There are other issues in life that led to this but these experiences stand out, and I’m not willing to talk about those.

woman walking with bicycle on ground road

It’s time to get off the bicycle, don’t you think?

What do you mean?

You are cycling the same words to yourself, that you are not good enough. You are.

God

Bible Verses When Struggling

February 23, 2021

I’ll be honest, I’m not sure how I came to have these bible verses on my laptop. I’m sure that at some point, I was researching for either a Bible Study lesson or I pulled from a small notebook I used to keep in my purse. But, as I read through them, I felt myself relax and began to feel encouraged.

If bible verses aren’t your thing, I would still encourage you to take a moment and read through. I am sure you will find words that will speak to you and maybe even lift you up.

As always, if you feel yourself struggling, feel free to reach out to me at SwimmingWithTheRain@yahoo.com

Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.

Then the devil left him, and angels came and attended him.

The people living in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of the shadow of death, a light has dawned.

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.

The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light.

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear.

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.

He took up our infirmities and bore our diseases.

You of little faith, why are you so afraid?

Take heart, son; your sins are forgiven.

I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore, be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves. And if anyone gives even a cup of cold water to one of these little ones who is my disciple, truly I tell you, that person will certainly not lose their reward.

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

And so I tell you, every kind of sin and slander can be forgiven.

Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.

Immediately, Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith, why did you doubt?”

I have compassion for these people.

Don’t be afraid.

The angel said to the women, “Do not be afraid…”

Surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.

Don’t be afraid; just believe.

Everything is possible for one who believes.

But, Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.

Rejoice in the day and leap for joy, because great is your reward in heaven.

When the Lord saw her, his heart went out to her and he said, “Don’t cry.”

Don’t be afraid; just believe…

Do this and you will live.

What you have said in the dark will be heard in the daylight.

Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life.

But, we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.

Stand firm and you will win life.

Be careful, or your hearts will be weighed down with… the anxieties of life and that day will close on you suddenly like a trap.

Pray that you will not fall into temptation.

An angel from heaven appeared to him and strengthened him.

Peace be with you.

And whoever comes to me I will never drive away.

This happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.

It is when a person walks at night that they stumble, for they have no light.

You will grieve, but your grief will turn to joy.

I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.

They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts.

In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’

Otherwise, they might see with their eyes, hear with their ears, understand with their hearts and turn, and I would heal them.

That you and I may be mutually encouraged by each others faith.

Therefore, the promise comes by faith.

But we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.

If God is for us, who can be against us?

In all these things, we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news.

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

We have different gifts, according to the grave given to each of us.

If it is to encourage, then give encouragement.

Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

He will also keep you firm to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ.

For who knows a person’s thoughts except their own spirit within them?

Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in your midst?

For my part, even though I am not physically present, I am with you in spirit.

But, each of you has your own git from God; one has this gift, another has that.

I would like you to be free from concern.

But knowledge puffs up while love builds up.

But whoever loves God is known by God.

“I have the right to do anything,” you say – but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything” – but not everything is constructive. No one should see their own good, but the good of others.

Even as I try to please everyone in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

For God is not a God of disorder but of peace.

Come back to your senses as you ought, and stop sinning; for there are some who are ignorant of God.

Stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord.

Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong. Do everything in love.

For they refreshed my spirit and yours also.

Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But, this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God.

Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow.

I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him.

Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God.

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.

For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.

In all our troubles my joy knows no bounds.

But God, who comforts the downcast…

I am glad I can have complete confidence in you.

God loves a cheerful giver.

If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.

For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Rejoice! Strive for full restoration, encourage one another, be of one mind, live in peace. And the God of love and peace will be with you.

All me

Bucket List Ideas

July 11, 2020

I’m not sure if the term ‘Bucket List’ was used prior to the release of the movie “Bucket List” starring Jack Nicolson and Morgan Freeman, written and produced by Rob Reiner, but it is something that everyone now seems to have. In fact, I have kept a running list on my phone since 2012.

Why on my phone? Because each time I have an idea, I can immediately add to it and the list keeps growing. I have only been able to scratch two things off of there and that has been within the past year (lightning bugs and covered bridges).

So, what’s the difference between a bucket list and goals? To me, a bucket list is something you do that encourages you to experience life and fill your soul with memories, while a goal is something you work toward and even build on.

For instance, with the lightning bugs, growing up out west, we didn’t have these things. Although I had read about these little flying glow sticks in books, heard lyrics about summer evenings being lit up with them in songs, and saw them set the backdrop in movies, they always held a romantic mystery to me. While visiting Ann in Indiana last year, there they were! She caught one for me and put it on my arm and I smiled like a child that had just walked in to Disney Land. I experienced this moment and it was amazing. I was experiencing life!

But, a goal… Now that is something you work towards and even build on. Let’s look at this website I am working on. For most of my life, if you would have asked me, “What is your dream job?”, I would have said, “A photographic journalist”. I had been writing for years, sometimes reading things to people, sometimes keeping my words tucked away. This websites name, I had planned out during the summer of 2018, even checking to make sure it wasn’t in use. But, it took time for me to have the courage to do it and even once I did it, it took strength for me to announce it to the world.

I don’t have the specifics written down of how I want to achieve each Bucket List item… It is generally just a few words about each thing because to me, getting in to too much detail, takes away from the spontaneity of how things are meant to happen. Take the Covered Bridges as an example… I didn’t know how I was going to make it happen, I just knew that I wanted it to. I ended up seeing one from the back of a Harley and another from the passenger side of a Corvette. Now, doesn’t that beat a tour bus? Which, I would done except for some good friends that made it happen.

And now, my Bucket List as of mid-2020…

Visit Atlantic Ocean. I have seen the Atlantic twice – once from a parking lot in Miami and the other from a road in Daytona Beach. I want to actually put my toes in it and feel the sand. Growing up on the Pacific and living on the Gulf Coast, I think it is only suiting to feel another body of water that boarders our amazing country.

Road Trip without a destination. Not the whole Thelma and Louise thing, fyi.

Ireland, Italy, Greece, Holland… Basically all of Europe.

Skydiving.

Gulf of Alaska.

Sex in a hurricane. (Ignore that one, Dad)

Walk Paris streets at night.

Drive a race car.

Grape stomping.

Visit with monks / nuns. I have this desire to be filled with their peace.

~~Covered Bridge.~~

Mardi Gras. I’ve been to New Orleans and I’ve done Bourbon Street. But, I want to experience an actual Mardi Gras with the parades and floats!

Grand Canyon.

Stay at a Dude Ranch.

African Safari.

Broadway show. I’ve seen plays and productions, but I want to be in actual New York City and watch a true Broadway show.

Opera.

Outer Banks.

~~Lightning Bugs.~~

Northern Lights.

See the Pope. I’m not even Catholic and I think it would be amazing to see this world leader.

Zambia 338ft Waterfall.

Ice fishing.

Wild Horses.

Blue Water Paradise in Arizona.

Concert at Redrock.

Stay in a seaside village as a tourist. I already live in one and I am curious as to what it is like to not be a local.

So, what is in your Bucket List? Where do you keep it? If you have not started one yet, start today. It is ok to let your heart dream and wonder, that is what keeps your soul alive and thriving. Make sure to add in simple things like lightning bugs but also far reaching like an African Safari. Doing this ensures that you take pleasure in life’s little gifts but keeps you seeking more. As you add these moments to your life, get lost in your surroundings and soak it up. Because a photo will not truly capture it, but your senses will.

Books

The Dream Daughter, by Diane Chamberlain

July 10, 2020

On Mother’s Day this year, I “forced” my boys to wander the bookstore with me. I say forced because it is not their favorite thing to do because they know it’s going to take awhile. One of them always ends up looking at the stack of books I am holding and says, “Do you really need all of those books or do you just want them?”, to which my reply is always, “Both!” But, they are used to it growing up with a mom that loves to read.

So, there I was with my stack of books trying to figure out which one to read while on vacation. I posted the photo on Instagram and basically explained my dilemma. Yes, I tagged each author’s name, assuming that I would hear from the followers of each person. It is a rather nice selection and I am a fan of each author, which makes it even harder to decide which one I should start with.

Imagine my surprise when I did receive a reply. But, not from a follower, but from one of the actual author’s! Yes, you read that. The actual author of ‘The Dream Daughter’, Diane Chamberlain. Wow! To say that I was thrilled and shocked at the same time may not be a big enough description.

Having no clue what this book was about, I packed it for my vacation. Here’s the thing, I have read enough books and by particular authors that I don’t necessarily even read the description any longer. Sure, I open it just prior to reading to get a feel for it, but I know who I like and what I like.

When Carly Sears, a young woman widowed by the Vietnam war, receives the news that her unborn baby girl has a heart defect, she is devastated. It is 1970, and she is told that nothing can be done to help her child. But her brother-in-law, a physicist with a mysterious past, tells her that perhaps there is a way to save her baby. What he suggests is something that will shatter every preconceived notion that Carly has. Something that will require a kind of strength and courage she never knew existed. Something that will mean an unimaginable leap of faith on Carly’s part.“
via Amazon

I have not read this good of a book in a very long time. Had I been left alone, I would have had it knocked out in a day. But, when you are visiting friends, the whole point is to spend time with them, soooo…. I found time to read while sitting next to the pool or on the outskirts of a group of people. Make sure that your household chores are done because you won’t want to get anything done and your kids might starve. Without giving the plot away, I have to admit that I was addicted to this book and ready to see just what would happen next. It makes you think about life and what you would do in that situation ~ Do you do as you are expected or do you take that chance?

Thank you to Diane Chamberlain for suggesting I read her book first. The Dream Daughter was excellent and I simply fell in love with these characters!

All me

Life Lessons

June 26, 2020

I have a tendency to learn stupid life lessons the hard way. Luckily, I have been keeping track of them for years so that I could one day share with the world. So, here you go. You’re welcome.

#114 ~ When moving a box full of yarn, make sure it is not dangling outside of the box so that it can attach to things.

#118 ~ Don’t wear long sleeves to the gym. It’s hot.

#119 ~ Driving in a small town on Sunday around noon when church gets out, is worse than rush hour traffic.

#202 ~ When the heater doesn’t work and it’s supposed to get to freezing temps, flip the breaker… Ahhh!!! Warmth!

#203 ~ Do not overfill your waffle maker… There will be a mess.

#205 ~ When falling down the stairs first thing in the morning, if you will lean towards one side, it will keep the pressure off your tailbone.

#206 ~ Pay attention when hitting the volume button on your phone a few times because if it is actually the power button, that whole SOS thing will start squawking through the blue tooth. It takes and act of congress to stop it BUT, you will remember who you listed as your emergency contacts in your phone and find out who the first one is to call.

#208 ~ If you are wearing your hat sideways, do not wonder why people are not taking you seriously. (unless it is part of a costume)

#212 ~ If a potential client is using foul words with you, stop. Their business isn’t worth it.

#228 ~ You know you are a parent when the most tearful moment in watching Undercover Boss is when the boss gives money for college.

#311 ~ When you can’t figure out why our new blue ray player won’t connect via wifi and you’re getting ready to call customer support to yell at someone, google the model number first. It’s not wifi capable… It needs land line.

#313 ~ Never throw the dog’s ball off the bed, they will then think it’s play time Especially if it’s a glow in the dark ball…

#320 ~ When not feeling well, make sure that you do not take the crack version of Sudafed before bed.

#322 ~ Always be nice to your clients. You may see them at your son’s baseball game… As the umpire.

#401 ~ If you feel the need to nap on the couch after work, you shouldn’t do it. Because it will be after 11pm, and you will be up doing dishes because you are restless.

#527 ~ Do not eat cupcakes with blue icing…

#604 ~ Getting in to a pool float is not a graceful act.

#615 ~ A flat iron will not warm up if you forget to turn it on.

#625 ~ When your children start staying in bed until the afternoon, you should apologize to your own parents for sleeping in until noon when a teenager on weekends and “wasting away a perfectly good day”. However, I think they should thank me for the quiet time I gave them.

#643 ~ Never take a water pill and then drink a bunch of water when getting ready to make an hour long drive.

#705 ~ Check the weather before heading to the grocery store if it even looks cloudy. Just a couple of sprinkles turned in to a dark sky with a lot of wind driven rain and lightning.

#804 ~ If it is a beautiful day on Saturday, you should go to the beach or get some time in the sun instead of thinking you’ll wait until Sunday. Because Sunday will end up being gloomy.

#807 ~ When babysitting an 8-month old, if they see you drinking out of a water bottle when they wake you up at 2am, they will think it’s their bottle and get upset.

#902 ~ When the ‘check engine’ light comes on, they have a cool thing at Auto Zone to plug in to your car and tell you why.

#917 ~ If driving on a back road that you are not familiar with, always have a full tank of gas.

#919 ~ Do not think that someone is trying to bribe you when they show up with your favorite wine and cookies. Maybe they are just saying congratulations!

#1003 ~ Do not wear high heels to an open house when you have to stand for an hour long teacher variety show.

#1115 ~ A dollar bill (or any bill) is 6 inches!

#1119 ~ Do not force the cork to come out from a wine bottle by pulling too hard. It can hit your face.

#1222 ~ Never leave food dye around teenage boys, they will add it to orange juice and it looks gross!

God

The Five Finger Prayer

June 13, 2020

Fifteen years ago, I was telling a good friend of the prayer we would say for Daniel’s dad each night (he was Active Duty military and deployed to the desert)… “Dear God, Please watch over my daddy because we love him and we miss him.” From there, my sweet boy would add in anyone else he thought needed to be prayed for. Sometimes, it would take awhile as he was trying to delay bedtime. Or, perhaps… God put it in to his heart that these random people needed to be prayed for. While talking about this with my friend, she told me of the ‘Five Finger Prayer’ that her devout Catholic mother taught her as a child, and she had passed to her own children. I remember thinking how clever it was to have this reminder and printed out an example, to hang on my refrigerator. I came across it the other day and felt compelled to share the idea behind, ‘The Five Finger Prayer’.

First, begin your prayers with your thumb which is closest to your body. Your thumb represents your family and your friends ~ those closest to you. But, also pray for your enemies, for they affect your attitude towards your loved ones.

The next finger is your pointing finger. Pray for those that teach, instruct, and heal, such as teachers, ministers, and medical personnel.

The middle finger is the tallest and represents our leaders. Pray for our country and world leaders, business leaders, and even boss / co-workers.

Surprisingly, our ring finger is the weakest of all. You can never pray enough for those that are sick, or in trouble. Praying for those around us is a way of serving, which is an important part of our purpose.

By the time that we get to the pinky, which represents YOU, your prayers for others will have helped with the perspective of your thought process. You will be able to pray with a clear mind as you thank God for the blessings in your life, admit your struggles, and ask for guidance.

I like to think of the Five Finger Prayer as a way to ensure that I remember specific groups of people, even some that I wouldn’t remember in my daily prayers. For ease in teaching younger children about it, there are several coloring sheets that can be used, if you search google. Why not use this as a way to prove that power of prayer can help to change the world and our hearts.

Health & Spiritual

It’s time to pick your own lane…

June 3, 2020June 3, 2020

Have you ever been driving behind a car for awhile and all of a sudden, you realize that your movements mimic theirs? They move a little to the left, so do you. They veer slightly to the right, you lean to the right. They speed up, your right foot presses the gas a bit. Over and over we do this, often times without realizing.

This was apparent to me while driving to the grocery store after work. I was stuck behind a vehicle that had very exaggerated movements. Turning from Main Street at the traffic light to a side road… He swung wide, I swung wide. Same thing at the roundabout… He went wide, I went wide. With another wide turn in to the parking lot, I giggled when I realized how I was mimicking his driving. Then it’s as if a light bulb flickered inside my brain and I thought, “Is this what we do in life… Mimic those around us?”

My brother’s words from my early driving days came back to me… “You’re like that song, ‘Give me 40 acres and I’ll turn this rig around…’ but you don’t drive a big rig, you drive a small Honda.” In my defense, I had grown up around people that drove pickup trucks so that’s how I honestly thought you turned around… Big wide turns!

Isn’t this what life is sometimes like? Is it perhaps ingrained in to our minds that we are supposed to act a certain way because it fits the status quo? For instance, we should peel a banana fully before eating, only use a certain brand of detergent, always tuck the bottom part of the flat sheet in… When do we stand up and say, “No! I like to only peel the part that I am taking a bite out of, I prefer All over Tide detergent, and I like my sheets untucked!”?

How many of you heard the phrase from your parents regarding your up to no good friends, “If they jumped off a bridge, would you?” Sure, it’s a question, but they weren’t really expecting an answer. Because if we did answer, we would dutifully hang our head and say the obligatory, “No”. (By the way, you get extra points if you said m’am or sir after telling them your answer.) But, in our heads, as the inexperienced children we were, our brain was yelling, “Yes! Because these are my best friends and they will do anything for me!” (You get extra points here if you have ever said this to your own children because now you know better. Ha!)

Now that we are adults, who are we still following behind in traffic? Is it your significant other that tries to makes you realize it’s just easier to go along with their opinion? What about the friend that makes you feel guilty if you don’t feel like painting the town red on a Friday night? Let’s add in the co-worker that always seems to act a bit superior towards your differing work loads. And then there’s the school parents that belittle you for not wanting to take part in the newest fundraiser.

It is time that we learn to drive our own way. Choose a lane and stay in it! As women, we have a lot of life experience. We know how to make choices, we know what type of wine we prefer (Pinot Noir girl here!), we know how to prioritize work, and we know how we like our coffee. So, why would we let someone else dictate our lane? It’s time we speak up and take responsibility for our own lives. Is the person in front of you driving too fast… Then slow down. Weaving in and out of traffic… STAY IN YOUR LANE! Drive at the speed you need to and enjoy the scenery IN FRONT OF YOU.

Ironically enough, while in the store thinking about these things and pushing my cart down an aisle, I was busy looking over to the side and a nice looking distraction caught my eye… Bam! There went my cart right in to the corner of a cookie display. The light bulb in my mind didn’t just flicker… It was as if a brand new stop light had just been installed.

Although those cookies really did look good, I’m trying to be healthy, so I fixed the display and moved along. I made a choice. I left the cookies and went to find the bug spray (trying to get some yard work done and the mosquito’s are just crazy right now). Don’t start looking around while driving, wondering what is out there. Pull over to the side and decide what path you want to take.

We all have choices to make in life. Sometimes we do need guidance, especially when visiting a new place. But, this is our life and it is time we took it back. We can give our opinion and speak up on the way that we expect to be treated. We can choose to stay home on a Friday night and binge chick flicks. We can choose to better ourselves and live a life that WE are proud of!

I am giving you permission to stop, decide if you want to take the scenic route. You don’t have to go in the direction you have always been heading, following someone else, the one they say is the best. Look around, which direction do YOU want to try? Because girl, I am telling you… YOU ARE WORTH IT! Now, buckle your seat belt, put your sunglasses on, and turn your blinker to the direction you want to go!