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Swimming With The Rain
Life

What I Should Have Asked For On Christmas

  • January 1, 2021

2:57am and I am jolted awake with the realization that it is Christmas morning and I am filled with a sense of excitement, only to realize, I am alone this Christmas.

There were days that I wanted to decorate but then 30 seconds later, I would wonder what is the use… Who is going to see the tree besides myself… Who is going to appreciate the ornament from when my youngest son started believing in Santa Claus or when my oldest son started his first job at Publix… Who is going to laugh with me when looking at the chewed up branches from the puppy last year…

This is when most would say, “Do it for yourself! Make yourself happy!” Well, let me tell you, I’ve been single a very long time and I’m kind of over that mantra.


I was asked recently what I wanted for Christmas and I finally understood exactly what I wanted, more so need…

I want your time. I want for you to want to spend time with me.

I want you to be present. Pay attention, have a meaningful conversation.


I want you to ask me questions. Ask me how I’m doing being away from family. Be interested.

I want you to realize that gifts are not about the money spent, it is about the heart and love that went in to choosing that moment. If it’s a $5 coffee mug but you know that each time they look at that cup, they will think of you, PERFECT! You created several moments with that.


I want you to realize that it is the simple gestures that mean everything to me, not the grand over the top ones. Just be there.

It’s now New Years Day… These words have stuck with me for over a week but I had been scared to publish. What if someone took offense? But, my gift is to now share my thoughts, realizing that I am not the only one that felt this way.

If you feel that this is what you should have asked for for Christmas, share these words. Maybe it will resonate with those that need to hear it from you. If you’re trying to think of the perfect gift for someone, think of these words and give someone your time.

Life

Courage can start with picking out new pottery

  • June 7, 2020

Yesterday, I spent the day helping a friend move to a new house that she bought. It’s perfect for her and that view… Oh my! The spacious back yard overlooks the bay, with plenty of room on the back deck to enjoy the water and sunrise. She was super lucky that the previous owners left window boxes with freshly planted petunias, adding to the charm from either inside or out.

Adding to the charm of her new house was her variety of plants in colorful, sometimes eclectic, pots. The back of the moving van looked similar to that of a florist making deliveries, with wandering Jews and Ivy hanging from the wood rafters, and bowls of petunias and begonias packed in tightly. All that seemed to be missing were the plastic card holders with well wishes offered.

My slightly green thumb was beginning to itch. Oh, how I missed the color of outdoor plants! They always brought a smile to my thoughts, seeing them on my porch after a long work day, as if their flowers were saying, “Welcome home!” I’d always longed for my backyard to look like what my mind had imagined while reading ‘The Secret Garden’… Filled with whimsical plants in colored pottery lining the pebble covered paths, leading to a hidden bridge that connected to a maze of wandering ivy, luscious plants, and vibrant bushes with butterflies dancing around. Sure, there were times that I would add flowers to a dirt area in my backyard, but with kids and a dog running around, they didn’t last long. And in reality, if I would have had a secret garden, I would have gotten lost in there with a book, never to be found. Would that really have been such a bad thing, come to think of it? Ha! Looking back, it could have worked. You see, when my youngest son was little, he loved to help me pick out flowers for our front porch, always trying to find the right ones that smelled good or colors he thought I would enjoy. And when it would rain, instead of getting frustrated, he would say, “The rain is watering our plants and the sun will help them grow“. But, as time went on, sports, life, and challenging schoolwork got in the way. It seemed that suddenly, planting flowers with mom lost their thrill.

But, here I am with this sudden desire to watch plants evolve in to their own shape, maybe similar to watching my kids change and grow. (Well, that was just an A-HA moment, need to make a note of that.) So, I head to the store early on this rainy Sunday morning, to wander the garden section. The peace of mindlessly walking around, smelling the herbs, and reading different labels reminded me of the long ago quiet bookstores. I selected a variety based upon full sun, mid sun, and light sun, along with annual versus perennial. Not caring for the bland selection of pots (or pricing), I headed to a discount store hoping they would have some that caught my eye. This was going to be my chance to have the courage to go for something a bit more vibrant, not just practical and sturdy. They did not disappoint!

The heat index is already pushing 90 with 85% humidity at 10:30 am and I felt the need to do this today, why? What was I thinking? Oh, that’s right… My slight green thumb was itching! But, as I found my hands in the potting soil, adding to each pot, deciding which plants should be combined or left with their own kind, that old feeling came over me as I found where each one belonged. But, this time, it felt a bit different… These plants were at home.

Just as I was feeling quite satisfied with my progress and packing up the empty containers, a text came through from my friend across the street. “I look out my window and there you are with two different color gloves!” Laughing, I replied back with, “My damn dog seems to think they are great chew toys so when the cabinet is open and she can get to one, she snags it and starts trotting off. Freaking dog!” I needed that moment to break up the moment and look up at the sky.

A summer storm was coming in, so I lined up my new plants and admired my baby steps in purchasing an array of somewhat colorful pots. They’ll spend a day soaking up some rain, reaching for the sun, before I decide where to place them. As I stood back to admire the beginning of my colorful world, I reflected on the words of my son from 10 short years ago that is more a metaphor on life than he knew at the time… “The rain is watering our plants and the sun will help them grow“.

I had some cuttings from a plant that I trimmed down that had finally grown sufficient roots. Broken super glued coffee cups and small plastic pots are the perfect place to transfer these small plants while they adjust to their new environment.
This type of pot is something that I would have never picked out before. But, I loved the look and have always admired this style when I have seen in other peoples gardens.

So, what are you waiting for? There is always going to be rain, but there will be sun, and that is when we grow. Find the courage to pick out your own pottery and let your vibrant side show! For those of you that have seen your friends admiring your plants and beautiful pottery, just remember what an excellent gift that would make for them when the time arises. Not only is it the plant and the pot it is in that they admire, it is YOU, and your courage to do what they are striving for.

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